Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lifestyle. Show all posts

To My Valentine's

WELL. It's been a little while, sorry. Uni work and a wobbly brain has got in the way but there's been fun stuff too so it's not all been doom and gloom (although I sent my pals Valentines not realising we were no longer doing this now they have significant others so guess who feels like a loser now!) But it's fine, I bought some new dresses so whatevs. and mainly why you should love yo'self but I thought seeing as it's V*lentine's D*y I'd talk about the amazing gals in my life.

10/01/18 | Nothing's Gonna Touch You In These Golden Years

I remember exactly where I was when I heard of David Bowie's passing. I was in the High Dependency Unit at hospital, in limbo after being told I needed new lungs but not yet knowing if I was able to be listed. In short, not a Good Place. When I was thinking so much about my own mortality the fact that one of my idols had gone so suddenly was a huge shock, it was too mortal for someone so extraterrestrial. I felt so numb, which was weird because I'd never felt like that over the passing of a celebrity before.

Except Bowie wasn't just a celebrity, he was a true icon to me and so many others. I grew up listening to him as my mum is a huge fan, I remember looking at her records and being in awe of this strange man with the different coloured eyes. His music brings back so many memories of childhood, from singing along to Sound & Vision in the back of the car to bopping around the living room to China Girl when I thought no one could see me. Doing the dance to Golden Years from A Knight's Tale with my friends in the playground and practising my catwalk to Fashion (again, when I thought no one was there!) Of course Labyrinth must be mentioned. As I got older I began to appreciate him as a person too. He showed us it was ok to be a bit strange and different, as someone who always felt like (and still do in many ways) I don't quite always fit in with the crowd it was comforting. The press vilified him in the early days but still he carried on doing his thing.

So I sat there in HDU feeling heartbroken yet at the same time thankful for the joy he provided me over the years and for the many hours I'd spent escaping whatever stress was going on in my life by listening to his music. I decided that if I got my second chance at life I was going to try be a little more Bowie - live how I wanted to and worry less about others opinions. And that's exactly what I'm doing now I have these new lungs! So thank you Starman for inspiring me to live my best life. I think we could all try and be a little more Bowie.


08/01/17 - 'I'm just a girl, standing in front of a mirror, asking it to love her.'

I'm in a bit of a chatty mood aka procrastinating wildly - but I've decided to turn this blog back into a little diary that I'm going to try and do daily because I'm too lazy to do my actual real life journal. I know it's *supposed* to be all quality over quantity in blogging but actually the number one rule is to enjoy it. I said in my January Goals I wanted to do some writing purely for me, even if it is just something silly - in fact most of these posts are silly, I don't think I've ever offered any wisdom on here but that's ok as it's better left to people are who are better at articulating their thoughts. But I'd rather just document my life the way I used to blog and if anyone likes it then that's cool but it's also cool if not because at least I have a lil online scrapbook to look back on!

Hat Nine by Savannah Miller () Coat Jeans GAP customised by me Shoes

So I came back to Brighton on Friday, the fridge had been turned off so everything was rotten but other than that mishap all is good. Sunday was spent feeling v sad and ill and tearful until I realised it was just because of an iron infusion I'd had at Harefield last week then I felt ridiculous and snapped out of it. Bloody drugs! Don't do em kids. But today was better, I was at the library which is now open until MIDNIGHT - this pleases geeky me immensely. I swear to God every time I go to the library I see at least three people from my course on the verge of a nervous breakdown. But me, I had to research a guy called Demetre Chiparus who was apparently 'one of the most important sculptors of the Art Deco era' according to Wikipedia. I declare this a lie because if it were true I'd be able to find more goss on him and I fooking can't. But in more successful news I submitted an essay that I've been working on for months and although I'm glad to see the back of it I get more worried than I used to about handing stuff in - I feel like they'd be reading it like 'Wowowowow, 24 and still an absolute dumbass' hahaha.

Before I go I'll just leave a link for if you too fancy donning them with a beret


January Goals

but I have goals that are more specific for this month too. Actually I don't see why they're particular to January but never mind, here they are!

Postcards From Paris - Day One

Just before Christmas I went to Paris, I may have mentioned it once or twice. It was a big post transplant dream and I was lucky enough to squeeze it in before the new year! My mama and I were only there for two days so obviously didn't see everything but I loved every minute and already can't wait to go back. I also really, really want to go to Versailles more than anything! Here are some snapshots from the first day of our short but sweet visit.

Hello, 2018!

Happy New Year gang! Been a little while innit? I hope you had a lovely evening whatever you did, we had our usual party but I was in my jimjams at 12:05 - the benefits of having a party at home, you get the best of both worlds. I am now eating chocolate yule log in bed, starting the year as I mean to go on.

Blogmas #2 & #3: uni week #10

Way too many hashtags in that title. What a joke I am, I failed at Blogmas on day two - this is surely a new record for me? But in my defence I had the worst migraine yesterday. Sometimes I feel like whenever I say I'm going to do something, especially blogging related, my body is like 'Nope!' I definitely jinx myself haha. But anyway, it's been a while since I've done a uni update so here's the latest although not much has gone on.

Blogmas #1: December Goals

I gots Christmas on the braaaain. Seriously I'm like a child, literally actually because I've spent the past hour trying to choose what Sylvanian family to get Baby Florrie. How those things passed me by as a child I do not know, they're so bloody cute! but now I think , wahhh. Florrie will like either, this is totally for my benefit when I come round to play with her toys hahaha. I'm completely digressing but that's because I have failed on all of my and just wanna skim past be fair I've been ill (woop to those cf and post-transplant problems!) and I've been sleeping every spare second away but honestly, it's like December has hit and I've sprung into action because Christmas is my JAM. I totally get it's a difficult time for so many people and we know it's materialistic etc etc - but for me it's about spending time with loved ones and I have so many fun memories of this time of year. After transplant it feels even more special and I'm so grateful to my donor for giving me another Christmas I wouldn't have had if it weren't for them (it goes without saying I think of them and their family even more so now.) So I have a few festive things I'd like to do this month and here they are:

Uni Week 6: Relating To Royalty?

By the time you read this I will probably be at home! It's Reading Week and I've been so looking forward to it. I obviously am looking forward to seeing everyone again but I won't lie to you, I'm super psyched to see my Freddy-Boo-Dog again. He'll probably sulk and ignore me but I'll force him to be my friend. I can't wait and I know that secretly he'll be excited too even though he'll never admit it. 

November Goals

Well I'm pretty pleased with myself because I didn't do a bad job at all at keeping up with my October Goals. I didn't slack on the skincare front and I've definitely been focusing a bit more on myself by surrounding myself with the right people. The one thing I didn't do too well on was keeping a blog schedule but that's not surprising I plan to rectify that this month, here are my other November Goals...

Uni: Week 5

This week has been all werkwerkwerk. Kinda forgot about all the essays and presentations I'd have to be doing when I got here hahaha. I have Reading Week soon so I have a week to get as much stuff done as possible because I really don't fancy spending my week at home working because time spent with family and friends and Freddydog is something I'm definitely not going to compromise on! Alas I have decided to get ill again this weekend, which is just brill.

Uni: Week 4

This week has been about trying to get back into the swing of things after last week's little blip, hence the radio silence heree. I settled back into my uni house quicker than I thought I would after a week of home comforts but I'm really missing a decent kitchen/living area and a bath! Student houses are not the one.

October Goals

Hallo! I hope you've had a good week. Mine has been somewhat manic what with moving to Brighton and starting uni but I've loved it so far, I honestly don't know what I was worried about. The people have been lovely, the place is beautiful and my course is super interesting! I have the cutest walk through The Laines to uni and I feels lucky. The only downfall was a fly problem in my room when I got here but Mr Pest Man has sorted that so now all is well. I'll definitely do a room tour once I've made it a bit more homey!

Even though I think I'll be a little bit busy I still have some goals for October...

1. Sort my hair out! I mentioned before that after transplant due to a mix of medication and a big surgery my hair went a bit nuts and started falling out. Not majorly so compared to some but my hair was always so thick so it was a big deal for me! It's started to grow back which I'm so happy about but it just means that the length of my hair is all uneven - basically I look like I've had a bad extension job hahaha. So I need to get myself a decent haircut because right now I can't do anything with it but whack it up in a bun! I'm thinking a bob is the way to go but we shall see.

2. Keep up a skincare routine. I'm lucky that my skin is quite clear but this means I can be lazy with keeping a routine - however after sticking to one for the past month I've noticed such an improvement so I want to not let it slide! I'll do a post on the products I've been using as they're all really affordable and not tested on animals so winner winner chicken dinner (or not, I dunno.)

3. Focus more on me. I'm not saying I want to be totally selfish, I just don't want try and please everyone all the time. I started this already and it's so liberating! No more people owing me money and never getting it back, no more people borrowing my things and ruining them, no more letting people make me feel bad when I'm just being myself instead of who they want me to be. I've had to cut a few people out too but that's life, I don't want to spend it feeling drained all the time. Quite a weight off my shoulders really!

4. Try to keep up a blog schedule. I have so much to post including stuff from the summer but I haven't gotten round to it yet! It may not be *seasonal* but I much prefer just blogging about what I want to blog about, old school diary styley. Hopefully someone out there will like it haha!

Do you have any plans for October? Other than Halloween fun!

A New Adventure!

Tomorrow is my first day of uni 2.0...I originally started this blog back in 2011(!) to document life at university whilst living with cystic fibrosis. Ironically CF put an end to that venture and as well my heart just wasn't in it, but as you may knowso now I'm attempting it again doing a different course at a different uni. There's absolutely no way I'd have guessed how things would turn out back when I began this blog! This is like a new beginning in a way and if, like me, you like things being neat and rounded my first day at uni (tomorrow) is actually exactly two years to  As someone who likes matching socks, even numbers and a colour co-odinated wardrobe I find this weirdly satisfying! On that day I was sitting in a wheelchair on oxygen - if only I could go back in time and tell myself and everyone that everything would be ok! I'll still be blogging about life at uni with CF but obviously this will be a bit different to before as although I'm sure it'll be very challenging still I think there'll be fewer difficulties this time round. I'm so excited!

Of course I'm using as my student card pic 😂

Postcards From Donegal - Ramelton & Rathmullen

For my first trip post transplant my mama and I went to Donegal in Ireland. , which I can vouch for because it's where my grandparents live and . The last time I went was three years ago and that was before transplant so it was great to see some family I'd not seen for ages! We visited most of the popular places, I find Donegal to be quite touristy on the whole as the scenery is beautiful, it has great beaches and the locals are really friendly so it's a popular destination for both visitors from abroad and the Irish themselves. But these places are so familiar to me so I thought I'd try and make it a little more personal. So I want to do a few posts on Donegal rather than one big post and also this way I can share more photos because I took a lot. First up, let's go to Ramelton and Rathmullan! We visited these places on the first day and were super lucky with the weather as it was so sunny and didn't rain (this is a big deal haha!)

The Happy List #26

Ok so first of all I just want to say a big thank you for your lovely comments...I was super nervous about posting it but in real life I think I just blurt things out (I wish I didn't) so I suppose it's no different on here! But if it helped anyone going through the same thing, then good. I thought I'd write a Happy List to prove to you I'm not really a miserable bastard even though I am a bit because I should be in Spain right now but decided last minute not to go because I was just feeling really off. After a year of excellent health my body is back on its bullshit but then again, I've had a year of excellent health. Not since I was diagnosed with cystic fibrosis aged 2 have I had an entire year off antibiotics either IVs or tablets and that's something to celebrate and be thankful for. Over the past few weeks Harefield did all the tests but discharged me as an official medical mystery. I had a sense of deja vu because of all the weird symptoms so readbecause I write about all the *exciting* things that happen to me and now I feel like House himself because I may have solved the mystery that none of the doctors could solve after two weeks of every single test, even my discharge letter said 'inconclusive'. I'm half proud but also half scared because I don't want to wake up one morning with a giant ankle, especially as we're coming up to boot season. Plus I kinda don't wanna be allergic to any of the drugs I'm on as they're rather important so I'm hoping I'm just jumping to conclusions. I shall phone the doctors on Monday!  But anyway, onto the Happy List!

The 'pub' in my brother's garden named after the one and only Baby Florrie

An Honest Chat About Mental Health After Transplant

So yesterday I had a meltdown of epic proportions that would shame herself (or make her proud, I'm not quite sure actually.) The irony of getting upset about being ill making you even more ill so you end up in a ridiculous circle! Transplant doesn't magic away all of your problems, I still have CF so have some of the same issues and am now faced with new ones too. Of course life has improved so much, I'm so grateful to be able to do more and have this extra time so I think some people may read this and think I'm being so bratty! But I think it's important to talk about, so I will.

A Mini Blip

Ok, so I might be making it sound more serious than it is but I am in Harefield Hospital currently as I came back from Ireland with a temp, headaches, extreme fatigue and a slight drop in lung function - boo! Although in all seriousness I was feeling very crummy and a little worried about it too to be honest and I never really worry about health things. I don't see it as something I have much control over other than how I feel about it and I don't worry about stuff until last minute when I have to - like I didn't worry really about end stage CF until I was in the literal end stage on life support and thought 'Oooh crap, maybe I am in trouble here!' hahaha and then I think I had a breakdown which was fun. There was a bit of hassle getting a bed so I think that this got left for far longer than it should have (although my CF clinic were absolutely brill, as always 💜) but saying that this isn't all Harefield's fault, they just don't have the money and resources that they deserve which is so frustrating for patients and staff alike. However that's a rant for another day! This post is all about me, lololol.

cystic fibrosis, lung transplant, post lung transplant, bronchoscopy, lung biopsy, harefield hospital
Looking rough but I'm not a morning person ok?! Am not used to these 6am wake up calls haha!

Weekend Reading List #8

It's been a while since I've dedicated a post sharing the love on here - whether that's other blog posts by some absolute babes, instagram accounts I've been loving or just random links from t'internet. So here's a list of links I think you'll love just as much as me!

I owned guinea pigs as a kid and 10 year old me would have been all over fact 24 year old me is too. Also,

Dunkirk is one of the best films I've ever seen despite it leaving me an emotional wreck and sums up all the feels.

I am obsessed with Her videos are short and snappy and full of Parisian charm, every look is so wearable and almost effortless. Perfect if, like me, you're a bit of a French beg.

Hands up who else wants to live in Catherine's house? I love seeing snippets of her beautiful home and (there's no way I'd be able to keep it that neat though haha I'd have it covered in rubbish in no time!)

I accidentally stumbled across  and OH WOW. I can't believe these places actually exist! Perfect for fans of Wes, fans of interiors/exteriors or just fans of beautiful photos.

I love Leah's blog for her humour and honesty and her latest post  is no exception. I'm sure many of us can relate!

and so do I - what an absolute beaut. I'm so loving Katy's new appreciation for Green Day too, they're one of my all time favourite bands so the more Billie Joe's face pops up on the insta the better! Any more Green Day fans in the house?

I mentioned that I went to Tonight, Josephine with some pals recently and just thought I'd send you in the direction of It's probably the most instagrammed bar in London right now so you've probably seen it already haha but if not do go check it out as it's just so fab and happy!

Chloe is one of my favourite bloggers as she's always so honest and YES to her chatting more about contraception and sexual health on her blog. is a really interesting read, we know we're luckier than most women in the world when it comes to access to contraception but this doesn't mean that the system is perfect.

Amy's post on really struck a chord with me. As a kid up until university I was so shy and still can be sometimes. I'm not as quiet now and will chat to anyone but I'm still very introverted and I'll never be the loudest person in the room, which is absolutely fine. I'm also reading Quiet by Susan Cain and it's a fab read for fellow introverts!

Have you read anything interesting this week? I'd love some links, especially some new blog reads! 

Book Review | The Hunger Games Trilogy

As a general rule, I don't read much YA fiction and I never really did. I was basically 14 going on 40 as a kid and felt like I couldn't relate to stories dealing with drugs, alcohol and teen romances. I was too much of a square! But finally, at the grand age of 24, I read The Hunger Games trilogy by Suzanne Collins after falling in love with the films and spotting the books in my hospital's little charity shop. 

the hunger games trilogy book review, the hunger games, suzanne collins, young adult fiction, dystopian future fiction,

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